“I hate Kim” decided to have Kim Zolciak from Real Housewives of Atlanta Suck IT!
“This bitch has got to go! I can’t believe she is so delusional. Her children
should be taken away! She’s a hot mess. She sounds and looks like a man! And the
whole “big poppa” thing? Can anyone be that stupid as to think she’s not behaving
like a whore?”
I just got an email from some douche bag by the name of Ben Berkman. Ben Berkman is a douche bag for two reasons. The first- he sent me an email with the subject line ‘are you along for the ride?’ by this abomination of a band called paper tonges. and let me be the first to say that these guys are a bunch of posers. of course- you can tell by just looking at their press photo. I mean- seriously a couple of the guys have sunglasses on. I’ll get to more bashing of them in a second. But- as people- I will say that I have nothing against them and they are probably all cool guys to hang out with. Further more- for me to bash or hate on them for their overnight success would make me a hippocrite. I was in a “put together/ shop to the labels band- all about looks opposed to talent” type situation abut 4 or 5 years ago. In all fairness to paper tongues- their overnight success runs circles around mine- “in the poser band arena anyway”.
Ok back to the bashing. Ben Berkman- is a douche for not only sending me this bull shit, but by being a part of the over campaign as well. In all likelihood- Ben Berkman is either a record executive or the intern at the major that sent me this. Either way- with a name like Berkman- we can all conclude that Mr. Berkman wasn’t necessarily hawking records out of his trunk, touring or sending a Jamie Widder type report to earn any type of cred whatsoever. Anyway- the below link which will take you to the actual link of the “new hit song” that many of you will probably actually like is below.
Paper Tongues – Ride To California.
ok.
Iron Mike hamilton
stupid fucking bitch
Alright see what’s going on here in the picture above. I snapped it off via iphone at the baggage claim in the Buffalo Airport.
This bitch- is giving her driver hell, because she doesn’t know where her bag is and the driver- well he doesn’t even know what the bag looks like.
Stupid CUNT!
Rihanna debuted her new single, “Russian Roulette,” yesterday on Ryan Seacrest’s KIIS FM show.
It’s about “a woman on the verge” of killing herself. Some of the lyrics include: You can see it thorugh my chest/That I’m terrified/But I’m not leaving/I know that I must pass this test/So just pull the trigger.”
Well Rihanna never said sh*t about domestic violence, so it figures that the role model would continue to send positive, uplifting messages through her music like in the lyrics above.
The track ends with a gunshot and was penned and produced by her alleged former hookup, Ne-Yo. The video is set to premiere in prime-time on ABC. RiRi’s fourth album, Rated R, drops November 23.
You can listen up by clicking HERE
This is obviously a studio shot versus a candid concert photo, but check out this monster before and after:
Earth to Carbo Clarkson … you are a millionaire. I understand why the bulk of the Oklahoma Court system is filled with welfare-ridden mammoths. But buy yourself a trainer. And a cook who doesn’t use Crisco as a condiment.
Kelly has an excuse, though. She had PFI. We all saw this coming, like a rhino chasing down its prey. Jessica Simpson, however, is a wholly different story.
There is no way anyone predicted this …
… would become this in less than a year.
She must have pounded Bud Ice and eaten Pizza Shuttle every night to get that way in under a calendar year. Damn she was so hot. Which made up for the stupid parts. Now she’s fat and stupid. You know what that gets you in Hollywood? Donut duty (see Hewitt, Jennifer Love).
mariah carey sucks
Hey C’mon Mariah- clean it up! You know thats not appropriate for the office!
Anyway- here’s something that will scare you retarded. I actually met the devil earlier today. He called me up to say that he was in the area and kindly asked if he could stop by to maybe put a name with a face. He said- the reason for my phone call- I’m currently working with pitchforkmedia.com, dlisted, perez hIlton and blah blah blah to help them identify sources for blah blah blah, and grow their business through News, Data and Analytics- helping them to overall maintain their competitive advantage in the blogosphere and internet space. He then asked me if, “that is something that you think you could maybe want to be interested in- does that interest you? Do you think that is something that you think that you maybe want to get- perhaps involved in?”, he said and then he just miraculously appeared in my office. Anyway- I gotta say- he’s really not such a bad guy at all. He really isn’t. He was impecably dressed and spoke with a sexy british accesnt. He kind of reminded me of my old boss. I actually kind of like him. Hell – I actually liked my boss- until the bastard fired me for no reason. It actually turns out that the 2 of them are really good friends and have been for over 900 years. Maybe I can leverage that to get my job back. Let bigones be bisexual. Anyway- where was I going with this? Oh yes- when Lucas showed up. (that’s the name he goes by now- Lucipher is so antique sounding). when he showed up- he told me that he got a hold of my google analytics data- and saw that I am getting like a gazillion hits every day- for writing about stupid shit like this. I’m like- I know- seriously- you need to step it up in Hollywood there Lucas- I only update this shit like once a month. People are starving for entertainment. Then I found myself kind of busting his balls in a totally weirdout way- like a happy hour patron whatevs- Again he wasnt such a bad guy. Cut to the chace- like Constantin- Lucas is a bidnissman and certain people owe him money. Evidently Mariah Carey has been taking years of pergatory off of everyones life- as she has overstayed her purchased stay. As a result- third parties- that get kicked in the nuts everythime they hear her are rewarded years off of pergatory, because she has overstayed her 15 minutes.
Lucas told me that Mariah is now supposed to be in Hell with Bell, Biv and Devoe, the little bastards in ABC- another bad creation, immature, Kris Kross and Humpty Dumpty. Never the less- the stupid slut somehow- through her Ricky Bevins (Biv 10) connection blew her way into boys to men- (which on a side note- were last seen, reportedly, at the Kentucky Derby with Nick Lachey. Nick Lachey, was able to pull out his 98 degree trump card by not only marrying Jessica Simpson, but divorcing her as well- causing her to go manic depressive and prescribed medication- which made her fat- which in turn- sent her whole entire career to Hell. Boys to men- are in the clear, becasue their frines with Will Smith). Anyway- Mariah has over stayed her 15 minutes.
Lucas called me of all people, because he needed a favor and seeing that I only update this site like once a month or something and I get like 1,000 hits a day regardless- he felt that my readership could pass the following word along.
Alright alright Lucas- enough already! get the pitchfork out of my ass- I’m ticklesh! giggle giggle-
Mariah- I just talked to Satan- evidently your 15 minutes are up. ahh HAWT!!!!
Oh by the way- we won’t miss you, but I’m sure you’ll show up on a half and half milk carton- SKANK!!!!
Check out this awesome picture of Cher I found. This is from circa 1987. If memory serves me correctly this is what she was wearing on the battle ship video with all the navy faygs. Here’s a bit of Rock and Roll Trivia for Ya…
Not many people know this but- Bon Jovi played on that album.
Contray to the video- where he has a her tie die son- corn ball messy marvin looking mother fucker playing guitar (better looking than the mqsk guy though). Anyway- thats not him shreading- I know Richie Sambora like its nobody;s bidniss.
cher sucks
I don’t know what your thinking with that out fit- not appropriate.
Cher is terrible, but she is the firs one to abuse the Autodrone or tone thing. wait autodrone is a band here in New York. Maybe thats audidrone- somehting like that. It cranks. I saw them play a show with dirty on purpose at sinai like 4 years ago. I wonder what happened to that place.
What is the deal with Cher anyway?
